Dealing With The Tease

Matthew Fitzgerald
AskMen
August 18th, 2010

Flirting is natural, exciting and arousing. It’s human sexuality at its most fundamental level — the intimate dance between a man and a woman.

Women can’t resist flirting and are far better schooled in its intricacies than men. But female flirting has a dark side: The Tease.

SHE MANIPULATES LIKE A PRO
The Tease is a master manipulator. She is an expert at spotting male vulnerabilities, so she flaunts her femininity to capture a man’s attention. She drops sex-charged hints until she has her “victim” thoroughly mesmerized by her sexuality. And like putty in her hands, her prey showers her with attention and hands over his wallet for her to plunder, certain that he will eventually sleep with her.

Unfortunately, she will suddenly withdraw, leaving him crazy with fear about losing her. In turn, he begins to chase her even more by spending more money on her, unaware that The Tease has no intention of sleeping with him.

And if he gets angry and starts demanding sex, she’s shocked. “Oh, I thought we were just friends,” she’ll tell him, all the while calculating just how much he’s enriched her bank account.

SPOT A TEASE
Here are four ways to spot a Tease:

1- She craves attention
The Tease’s appearance is her stock-in-trade — she will spend hours on her hair and make-up just to go to the grocery store for a gallon of milk. And she’s usually “Walking Viagra,” wrapped in shape-revealing clothing with lots of cleavage showing.

2- She has no girlfriends
The Tease generally has no or few girlfriends — to them, other women are nothing but competition.

3- She has many male friends
Because The Tease draws power from male attention, she keeps many men by her side, and they all cater to her every whim.

4- She’s high maintenance
Not only is The Tease extremely high maintenance, both financially and emotionally, she will deplete your resources and give you nothing in return.

Teasing is all about the deceitful promise of sex; it’s a flagrant abuse of female sexual power. The Tease is a taker. She has absolutely no interest in reciprocation or feelings — her only response is to ask for more.

To The Tease, romance is a business. A stare, a smile, a touch, and a whispered hint are all powerful tools she uses to exert power over men.

Blame society, but make the change

IT’S SOCIETY’S FAULT
Society prepares The Tease for her role. A woman learns to manipulate men at an early age. As a child, she realizes that a wide-eyed look and a deluge of tears will have Daddy bending over backwards to play into her hands.

Once she’s older, a lick of the lips or a flash of cleavage will have the boys fighting with each other to be with her. She learns that the promise of sex grants her this power. In other words, she learns to tease. And teasing becomes the most potent tool in her arsenal of manipulation.

Of course, The Tease can only flagrantly abuse her sexual power if you let her get away with it. In our society, men are trained to flatter, show attention, grant favors, beg for sex, and pay for female companionship.

They blindly slave at their jobs 80 hours a week, just for the chance to hand their paychecks over to women. And women expect to be granted favors just because they are female .

This is unbridled female greed, which women force men to uphold. This is sexual abuse and The Tease is the personification of sexual harassment.

DEAL WITH THE TEASE
Here, now, are five ways to deal with The Tease:

1- Get a grip on your sex drive — it may not be easy, but The Tease counts on you to think with your penis, and she loves it when you beg and grovel for sex.

2- Turn the tables and stop paying attention to her — it will drive her crazy because she’s so used to being chased.

3- When she pulls away and makes herself unavailable, don’t chase after her.

4- Tell her you believe in equal rights and that she should pay her own way.

5- Recognize what she is from the get-go and walk away.

DON’T BE A FOOL
The Tease is the brazen embodiment of the worst aspects of female behavior. She should not be tolerated in our society. But all women are Teases to one extent or another — that is, they use their sexuality to get what they want from men.

Women should learn to respect men, not to take advantage of them financially or emotionally. But it’s up to us to demand nothing but partnership and equality from them.

Matthew Fitzgerald is the author of Sex-Ploytation. He has appeared on radio shows from coast-to-coast in the United States and in Canada, and has been featured on the Montel show and The Other Half.